I was on facebook yesterday and found a link to a blog entry titled "Don't Carpe Diem," http://www.huffingtonpost.com/glennon-melton/dont-carpe-diem_b_1206346.html Anyhow, the gist of it was, that older people always try to tell you to enjoy every moment of parenting and that is ridiculous. That there are a lot of moments that actually blow hard about trying to raise the little ones. She said it much more eloquently as you can read for yourself. But the thing that hit me was when she wrote that she didn't think people enjoyed parenting so much as they enjoyed having parented.
As I was nodding along, it led me to think about writing (as so many things do). Do I actually love to write or do I just enjoy having written? It certainly isn't nearly as difficult to get me to sit down on the couch to watch a movie as it is to get myself to sit in this chair and do some real writing. Then again, there are moments when I am in the groove, fingers flying on the keyboard, and feeling almost high on ideas. So much so that I snarl against interruptions like a junkie coming down from a fix. So I'm not sure.
I know I don't enjoy exercising but I am always glad when I have exercised. Are we a community of folks that only enjoy things after they are finished? Sometimes, in the midst of troubles, I'm already imagining how I am going to tell the story to my friends later. Of course, in those daydreams everyone always laughs uproariously at the story which may or may not happen when I actually tell it. But do you think we have become such an instant culture that when people say, "stop and smell the roses," we want to say," Yea, I already did."
You may be on to something, because that's how I feel after a workout - and a stretch of writing.
ReplyDeleteAnd no one is fooling me into thinking parenting is a total joy!
You make some excellent points. It's great to be positive and to have a heart full of gratitude, but sometimes life sucks, and it's okay to say so!
ReplyDeleteHello.
ReplyDeleteHonesty is always good.
Xx
You've nailed a lot of it. It's way more gratifying to say "I've written a novel" than it is to say "I'm writing a novel" (and if you want proof of it, just try out both lines at a party sometime).
ReplyDeleteStill, I think there is some joy in the moment, but it's not all roses no matter what.
I think that's a pretty fair statement for most of us in regards to writing. Aside from the emotional trauma I've had to endure, I've loved being a parent so far. I loved it when my kid was small, and loved it when he was older.
ReplyDeleteI do hate the school functions and stuff like that though. Ugh.
So how do I turn on that commenting after each person's comment thing?
ReplyDeleteAlex, I'm with you but parenting does have some pretty joyful moments
Emily, writers are asked for honesty.
Michelle, hello back, I agree
Rena, I think I have used both those lines at different times and you are 100% correct.
Rusty, if you've got to have emotional trauma and let's face it we all do, kids are probably the best way to go about it, at least while they are young, because you can still send them to their rooms.
The whole "live life in the moment" thing makes sense when things are great, but life isn't always that great at the moment. This is why I read books.
ReplyDeleteNancy, this post explains how to do the comment thingy:
ReplyDeletehttp://pearsonreport.blogspot.com/2012/01/new-and-improved-commenting-feature-is.html
Sorry, I don't know how to make it a link.
Lydia, this would be why I read books as well. Sarah, thanks for sending me to that site. It is fantastic and I followed it immediately.
ReplyDeleteYou make some really good points here. As for parenting, I love it all the time (even when I hate it) LOL.
ReplyDeleteMelissa,
DeleteYou are a better mom than I. I do not love parenting when I am having to discipline.
Excellent points to ponder. I try my very best to be present as I make my way through a day.
ReplyDeleteIt isn't aways easy, but when I'm in the groove I really do enjoy every aspect of what I am doing...from dishes to balancing my cheque book.
Funny thing is, when we really get conscious and feel ourselves breath, in and out, we can enjoy almost anything we do because it's part of what shapes us as individuals. Leaving that to a past reflection or a future hope means we never truly live fully in real time.
As for parenting...I have one off-spring...(I ate the other 2) and only kept this one because I needed someone to look after me in my old age. I do better as a child than a parent, hence I still love Legomania nights with my twenty-four year old daughter! :-)
Yes...I do live the moment!
I, too, have added myself as a follower as I think this here will be a fun place to visit!
Cheers, Jenny @ PEARSON REPORT
PS...I left a reply to your comment over at my place!
Jenny,
Deletethanks for following sorry I have been MIA. Still trying to figure out a schedule with this blog thing.
Some great ponderings here. I must remember to stop and smell the roses more often.
ReplyDeleteXx
Hey Michelle,
DeleteThanks, just be careful for any bees. :)